you’re not hearing me.

If I’m honest I want to say it far more often than those words actually roll out of my mouth.   I think what I’m getting at  is that you may be hearing the words I’m saying but you’re not really hearing what the words mean to me.   

Sure we could say that it’s my personality (INFP — it’s never about what’s on the surface.)  But I’ve been thinking that actually it’s probably far more common than INFP’s.   Because listening (which would be what is necessary to really hear what someone is saying) is one of the hardest things for us to do.    We like to talk too much.  We like what we have to say too much.     We like to think too much.   All of which put a damper on listening.  

Seriously, how often do we just abstract our favorite  or maddening bits from stories, movies, articles, speeches, sermons, prayers, books so that we can propell our take, our story, our motives.   

I’m in the listening business.  But although I really try to practice  listening – “active listening” for all you psycho-therapy nuts like me -  it’s still hard.   It’s still amazing to me how many times someone can say something to me and I dismiss it before I really hear what they’re saying.    I suppose in part that’s because  so much is shared standing in an office door or on the way out of a room as opposed to sitting across a table with a cup of coffee.  

Listening is a holy endeavor.  All to often I find that moments of real listening coincide with moments of real prayer.   So maybe listening does take us through the wardrobe and into the parts of life that cannot be seen with the naked eye.   Maybe listening is actually a way of seeing through this world and each other.  

Maybe listening is one of the best kept secrets.   Because maybe listening leads us onto the path of life.   Maybe it’s through listening (actually hearing ) each other that we’re able to hear the pulse that beats through the heart of all life.    Maybe if we were to actually hear each other, we’d be so much closer to actually hearing the God who continues to pursue us and call us back home.  

Speak, please. I’m listening.